Where does the time go?

As I turned to walk away I heard a little voice "Mommy." I glanced back to see him standing there in his brown faded cords, vintage superman shirt, blue cons, and a smile that was brighter than the sun. " Bye, Mommy.. I love you"he yelled as he waved standing on the the playground. If I stayed any longer I would have ran back and taken him out of school. I turned walked away crying, and wondered "where did the time go?"

Tonight, as I sat a small table, with a chair that I felt I was going to break,  I saw the name "Noah" written on a tag tapped to the table. His artwork hung throughout the class, and when I saw a picture taken of him on the first day of school, I wondered... where did the time go?

"Can you believe we are here?" My husband must have asked at least three times. My memory is distorted by the disturbing fact that I sported a piece of bean on my tooth for the whole night. Please forgive me for forgetting some of the details.

I realized tonight on our drive home, that we worry so much about not having enough time, that we miss out on time, then wonder where it went. Where did the time go? It went when I was worrying about a clean house, when I should have been playing. It went when, we were trying to cram so much stuff on a Saturday, that we missed hanging out with each other. And I have to tell you this, just because you are together doesn't me that you are spending time together.

Last Saturday we planned nothing! Like literally nothing. We casually went about the day doing absolutely nothing that "needed" to be done. I have to tell you that we enjoyed every single moment of it, we hung out, went to a book store, ate, played games and watched football.

I have to admit there were a few times on Saturday when I felt like we should have been "busy" doing something else. That we were missing out on something or someplace we needed to be. Oh Lord help us with our time. I pray that I would not miss out on the important minutes with these boys..

I thought it was always cliche to hear " enjoy it, it goes by fast." It is so true, time doesn't stand still, and we don't know how much time we have so lets enjoy it not being busy. Lets play, let the house get dirty and go get dirty outside, and heck lets drink out of the hose like we used to..

Thank you so much for allowing to share my heart as we transition into the new normal.. I have to admit that some days I still feel jacked up by it, but I am learning so much...

Moni